The trash will, however, get ripped open and spread itself around your yard in what can only be called as Redneck chic.
Guess what I'm going to be doing today?
Hint: It involves wearing rubber gloves, swearing at cats, dogs, wildlife and husbands all while carrying a new garbage bag.
So while I'm outside picking up trash, I thought I'd share a few of my favourite memories from our trip. Because y'all haven't heard enough about it as it is.
I'm such a giver.
Capela dos Ossos
In Evora, Portugal, stands the Church of St. Francis and next to it you will find the Chapel of Bones. It's a small chapel, built with the remains of over 5000 humans. Or so they say. I personally didn't count. That would have seemed weird. Weirder than posing with my daughter in front of a wall of human heads while saying Cheese! for the camera.
This room brings a whole other layer of meaning to the phrase Dead Heads.
Camel riding: It's harder than it looks.
Taking the ferry to Africa to spend some time in Morocco was one of the highlights of the trip for me. I didn't get enough time to explore the treasures of Morocco, instead only getting a small taste of what life in Tetouan is like. I fell in love with Morocco and its culture and I will be back to see it again in leisure at some point in my life. It's on my bucket list.
My daughter's highlight of the trip was when I decided to be a traditional tourist and climb atop a camel. And them promptly almost fall off.
Because camel riding is hard when one has rods in her spine.
SMARTEST MOVE EVER. The screams of my neurosurgeon are ringing in my ears.
But. I rode a freaking camel. And then it spit on me. Awesome.
The interior of one of the restaurants we dined in while in Tetouan. Also the inspiration to my living room makeover when I decide to stop dragging my feet and try to redecorate around my giant oversized, over-stuffed Godzilla-poop coloured sectional couch I stupidly agreed to let my husband purchase.
La Alhambra. Also known as a buffet of eye candy.
Granada, Spain was my favourite Spanish city. I don't know why. Every where we went was lovely but there was magic in the air in Granada. Perhaps it was spending the day inside La Alhambra. Perhaps it was getting stuck in a public washroom and having to impersonate a spider monkey to find my way out of it. While wearing a skirt. Whatever it was, Granada, you are the awesome.
Granada: The place where Fric officially had enough of me sticking a camera in her face every other second of the day.
Tasting my very first and very last anchovy.
It turns out it doesn't matter what continent I am on, I will never develop a taste for fresh olives or anchovies. Especially when they aren't adorning a pizza.
Also fun? Drinking European beer while playing pictionary with a Spanish bartender because neither of you speaks a lick of the other's language.
Valencia Coliseum, the place where blood is spilled.
One afternoon Fric and I had the opportunity to tour the Coliseum in Valencia and learn more about bull fighting. It was here I learned my daughter is a blood thirsty matador in training and I am more squeamish than I gave myself credit for. The coolest part of our time in the Coliseum was having the opportunity to watch the bull fighters train for their sport.
Those are boys who really know all about poking the bull and getting the horn.
Wait. That didn't come out quite right...
I love a good walrus.
Here's a random Tanis fact for you all: When I was in grade five I had to write a school report on an aquatic creature of my choice. I chose the beluga whale. It was inside the aquarium in Valencia that I finally got to see my very first, in person, live beluga whale. It was a very cool personal moment for me and my inner ten year old self. I may have been hopping up and down with excitement, even if I told others around me it was because I had to pee.
Also? A dork at aged ten will likely remain a dork at aged 35.
There may be a wee parking problem on the streets of Barcelona.
It was in Barcelona that I had the pleasure of taking my daughter on her very first subway ride. It was here that she announced to everyone on our subway car that she really enjoyed twirling around a pole.
I have never felt prouder as a mother.
Silence is golden. Especially when you are traveling with a 14 year old who likes to talk.
I love you kid, no matter what continent we are on.