The Gift of Bleeding Ears

Twas the night before the night before Christmas,

And all through my house,

Children are scurrying, much like a mouse.

I'm so not ready for Christmas this year. It's come too fast, it'll be gone too quickly. I wish I could slow down time and stretch it out, make this magical feeling of Christmas joy last just a tad longer.

Boo surprised us all by walking through the door two days early and my heart still hasn't quit racing. We were all sitting on the couch, like happy little potatoes, watching the reflection of the twinkling Christmas lights glare off our television set when all of a sudden his head popped up in the window behind us.

He banged against the window and then howled something about watching us to ensure we weren't being naughty but nice and I may have peed myself a little.

Generally, if you live alone in the woods with small children, and a large man starts banging on your window, it never ends well. At least according to all the horror movies the kids force me to watch with them.

Even my dog farted with spontaneous fear.

All I can say is that man had better be filling my stocking with something very sparkly to make up for his shaving a decade off my life span.

And speaking of presents, I have one for you. The Jumbster and the rest of us made a very quick video filled with tidings of non-frightening peaceful joy for all of you.

It's our way of saying thanks for sticking with us all year long and supporting my family by reading my blog.

And no, this gift is non-refundable and you can't exchange it for something else.

Although, after you watch it, you'll likely want to.

So, with that, I wish you all holiday peace this season.



Pssst. If you're looking for a little something else to read to tide you over until next week when I get back to business, check out my Hogwash from a Hoser blog. I wrote about the types of wishes I like to make and I went nose to nose in a boxing round with the Bloggess about whether Santa is a flesh eating zombie or not.

Have a merry weekend everyone!