Once upon a time there was a magical enchanted land, filled with trees and wildlife and a young family who called this land their home.
Their yard seemed endless and huge. 20 acres, which isn't huge but so much bigger than the postage stamped size balcony they had in the city.
There was a small dog who made the prettiest lawn ornament, always watching over his owner, always within reach of an ear scratch and a belly rub.
There was space for the little kids to play, the dog to run, the rabbits to hop.
Soon the yard filled up with wildlife. Bambi often came to munch on the lawn.
A lodge full of beavers moved in, mowing down trees and making trails.
The moose came to eat all the shrubs and flowers the yard owners had so thoughtfully planted.
There was space for them all. Come one, come all, the crazy yard owners whispered, inviting the wildlife to frolic and play.
There was so much room that one day, one of the yard owners decided to build a zeppelin hangar.
The yard seemed smaller. The space not as vast.
Then the little dog who made the prettiest lawn ornament passed away and the other yard owner decided there was space to fill.
So she adopted a new dog, who is the prettiest big lawn ornament she ever could want, who watches over his owner, always within reach of an ear scratch and a belly rub.
But this new dog, with this new barn, they took up more space than the yard owners had imagined.
With the little kids now grown into big kids and all the wildlife added into the space, the yard was starting to feel a little small.
20 acres can only hold so much.
But the yard owners told themselves, "It's all good. Our space is filled with love." And animal crap. But they ignored that and focused on the love and how the tightness of it all felt like a giant hug of love and not a poop-filled cramp.
Then he wandered in.
An even BIGGER lawn ornament.
He pooped on her lawn. Here, there, everywhere.
Suddenly there is no space for anyone.
The straw that broke the lawn owner's back turned out to be a stray horse who has no owner.
Now the yard owner twitches and waits for kids to pick up poop, dogs to shrink, wildlife to hide and the horse to found.
I don't care what the husband says.
We're gonna need a bigger yard.
And a shovel for all the poop.
*The horse has been taken care of. Take care of your horses, people. Don't let them poop on other people's lawns. It's just weird.*