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Nuts and Bolts

It's always interesting when I'm asked what it is I do for a living.

"I blog."

--blink blink--

"I write on the internet," I clarify.

That's when I see the invisible light bulb go off above their head. Which is when, inevitably, they ask, "Who do you write for?"


--blink blink--

"I have my own website," I clarify.

That's when they wrinkle their foreheads and squint their eyes. Which is when, inevitably, they ask, "Why?"

Why indeed. Why not, I always reply.

I've been asked why a lot this past week. I'm tired of the whys. I don't know, it's none of your business, because I can, because I was tired, I was pigeonholed, I was embarrassed, I outgrew it, I was left behind, change is good. All of this. None of this. 

I'm going to start telling people that 'blogging' is a fancy code word for being a dental assistant. I bet dental assistants never get asked why they do what they do where they do it. 

Or maybe they do.

Speak up dental assistants everywhere. Spread your truths here, my space is yours.


I'm running things a bit differently up in this space. I've added an email subscription option if having my words delivered straight to your inbox floats your boat.

There is an RSS feed to if you prefer that method of delivery. The Magical and Awesome Schmutzie fixed it so that if you were already subscribed to my RNM feed you shouldn't notice a change. I don't know. I write blogs. And read them. I don't really understand how any of this works. 

It's internet voodoo I tell ya.

Click here or click the tab that says 'Subscribe' up top under my name if either option interests you.

I'm your friendly neighbourhood voodoo priestess. Except, just like how RSS feeds, I know nothing about how voodoo works. 


Finally, there are some introductions I'd like to make. I'd like you all to meet my family. 

My husband:

He goes by Bruce.

My first kid:

Her name is Ken.

My second:

His name is Nash.

My third:

His name was Skjel.

My fourth:

His name is Knox.

Oh, and then there's me:

I had a little work done recently. Does it show?

Here's to the B side and keeping it real.

(ps. No more comment captcha either.  It's a bumpy ride, working out the kinks of the B side. Bear with me.)

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Reader Comments (60)

Those are some kick-ass names. Thanks for sharing them.

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJeni

Nice to meet you all.

One question. You get paid for this? I'm doing it all wrong.

Ah well, it sure feels right.

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBirdman

Two things, one your husband is quite attractive, two, it appears you are no longer a blond?

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCatherine Burden

Nice to meet you and the beautiful family.

I love reading RNM, but I have a feeling I'll love reading your words even more in the new space.

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBakingSuit

I like this. I actually never understood keeping names private. But then again I think of the Internet as the same as the real world - you walk outside and anyone can see you, take your picture, and ask your name. My son tells everyone his name!

Your family is ridiculously gorgeous, by the way!

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterEwokmama

I can hardly tell you had anything done.:)

Beautiful family you have there.

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered Commentergorillabuns

Did Nash and ken grow over night??! Jeebus I feel old. Lol!

Beautiful family! And I'm doing the reverse now! Go figure. Baha

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJess

Disgustingly attractive family . Also I'm a long time reader who thinks you are just the cats meow , so the next time someone asks why you write tell them this lady (me) in Staten Island New York depends on you to .lol

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

I love the new site. Great work by Schmutzie and I look forward to this "new" incarnation.

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJane

I'm totally digging the new look. And the fam, so amazing.

Who's your surgeon?

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKim

so I went and looked at what it would cost me to start over and decided no. That's not going to happen. My new plan is to fade into further obscurity and then once that transition is complete I will just start writing again in the same place I already am writing and it will have been so long that people will have completely forgotten who I am so it will be just like I started over. Clever, no?

I love what you've done with your teeth. Classy.

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTarasview

I feel like I am getting national secrets! Love their real names, they'll always sort of be fric and frac to me :)

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMolly

Yep..totally on board with the new blog! Loved RNM...looking forward to the new you. And...I'm with Molly, great names....but they're still just fric and frac. ;)

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJenn in Tenn

Your husband is a looker! And your children are gorgeous as well. I'm glad you're forging ahead in the blogging world, even if you outgrew RNM! It makes me feel better about my own potential writing changes... Which I've been mulling over for the last several months.

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

I get asked that question a lot about my wife. I just say she is a writer. I don't often get the where or but I get the what and then I just say on the Internet. Most often though, the curious bees like the writer response and leave it there. Or maybe its because they can't read and don't want to confess that by asking where they can read her writings. Hmmm

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHockeymandad

Great names, but I agree that I will always think of them as Fric and Frac.

Just curious, is Ken short for something?

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

Is it ok I am kinda crushing on you? It is actually more like "I should would like to meet her in person and have a real conversation" kinda crush.
By the way, you were one of my inspirations in starting my own blog.

Thank you.

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDustin

Hahaha! "Why are you a dental hygienist?" "I just love scraping 6 months worth of gunk off of peoples' teeth all day, asking them questions I know they can't answer because their mouth is full of MY HANDS, and giving them the bad news that they have cavities and have to see the big man with the drill." Aaaahhh bliss.

Those there are some mighty fine folks. I like to tell people I'm a bogger while making my eyebrows wiggle. Either they'll think I said booger or it's something sexual. In either case, I WIN.

And for the rest of the day I'll hear the shark from Nemo: "Hello. Name's Bruce."

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterArnebya

Sorry I laughed out loud at the work you've had done! haha!! You might want to stop going to "back alley, plastic surgeons"! I know they're cheaper but...ha!

You do have a very lovely family! Kiddos are so cute & hubbys not too hard on the eyes either! You are going to rock this blog also, I can tell already!

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterRhonda B

I will kind of miss Boo and Jumby, etc. but I like the real names. Nice for the new space.

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKorinthia

Been lurking for AGES. I feel like I now know you as a completely different person with real names. SURREAL! Love the new space!

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHillary

I will have a hard time substituting in their real names for their previous monikers. I'm loving the new digs!

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer Burk

You have a beautiful family, first of all. :)

Second: I work in Communications/Social Media. Before that, I was a Community Moderator/Manager. My most common conversation is still, "Okay, but what do you DO?" I get it. ;)

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTabatha

Just load a bunch of cheapie toothbrushes in your purse and you'll be fine. P.S. Wow.. they grew up overnight!

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNihilady

This is obviously lies. Those children are Frik and Frak--I'd know them anywhere.

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKaty

I almost never say what I really do anymore. I tried "intuitive counseling", "blogger", "writer", and "unemployed." The only one that gets no actual follow up comments is "unemployed"...so try that one :)

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJulie Barrett

I feel like I've been inducted to some secret society. I knew Knox/Jumby, I'd figured out Boo/Bruce through my tears as I read your original blog for Shale/Skjel. But Fric and Frac, have REAL names. Oh dear. ...and Bruce no longer requires you hide his face, or has given in and drank the koolaid. Whole nother world on this side of the rainbow.

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLaura in Little Rock

I am with the other ladies. I liked fric & frac but love their "real" names. So did you give Bruce the kool aid? Lol

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJen in MO

Look. I just need to see some more photos of your husband, to get a clearer picture, kthks.

Reading your children's names gave me goosebumps. Congrats on ..... becoming real like Pinocchio? I don't know - I don't know what a blog is for either, really. I like yours.

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered Commenteredenland

Bruce is HOT, SMOKING HOT. You lucky, lucky woman.

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterOuting from Lurkdom

I too will say you have a lovely family...they were lovely on the flip side too. The thought just hit me that you are brave, that is one of the reasons I hop over here so often. You inspire me to be braver. Thanks.

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered Commentertressyjo

You are all just as you were and more. Thank you for sharing the B side after letting us all get to know the A side. Sounds like I'm talking in euphemisms.

Just trying to say thanks.

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

It's fascinating to see you move forward like this. I've been around your blog forever, or it would seem, and seeing you bare yourself in a different way is....interesting.


Such a beautiful family, inside and out.

February 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAmy Bliss

I think a good answer is Why not??? If you said you wrote books no one would ask why and who do you write them for.

Thank you Schmutzie for your magic work. It was so awesome to see Side B show up in my reader.

February 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBridget

Fabulous. Magnificent. Wonderful. HUZZAH!

Love your face off, even with those horse teeth.

February 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKelley @ magnetoboldtoo

Schmutzie is amazing.

And all of your reasons: make total sense.

Congrats on your new digs.

February 23, 2013 | Unregistered Commenteralexandra

I'm just glad you are still blogging!

My cousin asked me why I read blogs like yours and Mr Lady's - when they often make me cry, and your stories stay with me. I told her it was because your strength inspires me, and your writing moves me.

February 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterIsland Mummy

Oh goody I'm so glad to see you posting again! The new look is very easy on the eyes.

I think we blogging women should just tell people it's a fancy word for a stripper. That will shut them up.

February 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterThe Sadder But Wiser Girl

Ditto, ditto and ditto to all of the above comments. And--my what big teeth you have! Bahaha.

February 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

Love this post, and the introduction of the "real" names. Thank you for trusting your "fans" with that level of intimacy!

Your family is beautiful. You might want to have a follow-up consultation with your surgeon, though!

February 25, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKillian

Great new blog space and nice to meet everyone by their real names, although your children will forever be Fric, Frac, Shale and Jumby to me. Sorry, children.

I found your blog a few years ago after losing a child to serious congenital defects. My son lived for only a few hours after birth, and in my despair I needed to read the words of someone who'd been there, someone I didn't know and didn't need to talk with. Thanks for writing the blog, it meant a lot for me at the time and I've been reading ever since.

February 25, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAnna

Real names and everything? I feel like I have been let in on a big secret.

February 25, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLeah

You look all kinds of sexual in your pic! I know what you mean about the questions about blogging - I generally lie. Glad to have followed you to your new space x

February 25, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterScarlett

Ahhh! I've been picturing your hubby with dark hair! I don't know WHY....

February 25, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAliciaC

I am crazy for the new site. Absolutely crazy for it. In fact, I'm inspired...

February 25, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterStefanie

Tanis, I love the new look. It's hard to believe it's been so long since we both passed each other in the school hall when Skjel was attending with my son. Your blogs have always made me smile, laugh, cry, blush or laugh some more. You and your family are gorgeous (even behind all that work. LOL) and your transformation through the years evident. I think this place suits you.

February 25, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMarcy

LOL. Very funny blog. You really are a good writer. You shouldn't be explaining why you write. I mean, isn't it obvious? She writes because it is her passion. There is never an exact reason for it since writing is a gift that is good to be shared. Expressing ideas is a form of sharing and in this modern world, there is what we call as free expression.

February 25, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJustin Johnson

Ken and Nash? I cannot BELIEVE how much "Nash" has grown since I've been following you.
I'll try to adjust to the changes.

February 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer Leeland

Oh, and just tell the you're a writer....and then WRITE THAT BOOK I keep begging you for!!! LOL!

February 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer Leeland
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